and because of this I’m starting to question my whole existence as a human being. Why do I care that I don’t have that many friends. I like my friends and just because I’d rather be with just the three of them for my birthday and not invite a slew of other people who won’t come I feel like a friend failure. And because Vlad cancelled on me last night I feel like a dating failure. And because my senior project is still so confusing to me, I feel like a student failure. I just wish I could snap out of this melancholia.
I’m feeling so lost today. I’ve just been floating around today in my own sadness and crying for no reason. I am lost in my own life and unsatisfied with everything I’m doing/trying to do. At least my powerpoint is coming along nicely. But there are clothes all over my floor that need to be organized. And a senior project that needs to be finished. And a bathroom that I started to clean. I just feel blah today and I don’t know how to shake it off.